A new crop of pimples was always taking the joy out of things!
Doesn't matter whether you're a cartoon or a photograph guy, does it? Pimples are everywhere. And they always do take the joy out of things. Yes, Ted (for that is his name) - we know. Even your mirror image knows, because it's the one doing the talking.
Let's ask it for some advice. Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the pimpliest of them all? But the mirror doesn't want to say anything.But luckily, here comes a Friend in a Hat, saying "What's wrong Ted? You look all worked up!"
Ted explains that he has "a flock of chin blossoms" - which is one of the most disgusting expressions I have ever come across. That's another problem you have, Ted - the way you talk. But unfortunately Fleischmann's Yeast isn't going to teach Ted how to have a normal conversation.
Ted's friend tells him to lie low for two weeks and eat lots and lots of Fleischmann's Yeast. Yes, yeast. Three cakes a day, in fact. Yes, Ted, hide out in the house and eat yeast right out of the package. Yummo!
And then - Ted turns into a loaf of bread.
I'm kidding, of course. You know what happens, don't you? This is an advertisement, after all. Let's do the math: Yeast + Ted = Skin - Pimples. Elementary, my dear Fleischmann.
Plus, of course, girls. Swell girls. And when one of those swell girls asks where he's been for the last two weeks (she's been keeping track) Ted replies "Oh just out making sure there were no girls as pretty as you - and there aren't!" Smooth, isn't he. Just as long as he never mentions chin blossoms ever again.
[From Boys' Life, November 1935.]