Thursday, April 29, 2010
The Quink Tank
Beleaguered by a faulty pen
And thus began to greatly fear
Both for his sanity and career
Although, ironically enough
He should be worried about other stuff
To wit, the horrid screeching noise
He makes when mad and thus annoys
The clerks outside, the middlemen
Who never knew a lousy pen
And also McFlit's immediate boss
Is raging about hearing loss
And saying words that start with F
Concerning how he's going deaf
The clerks say cusses that end in -it
Which rhyme quite perfectly with McFlit
Then Suzie has a good idea
She is Employee of the Year
And is, alone among the clerks,
The one whose brain entirely works:
"Look, Mr. McFlit, just stop and think
If a pen is clogged, replace the ink!"
And with a flourish, she does just that
And stops his noise in seconds flat.
Now that McFlit has quieted down
The boss will lose that scary frown
He says to Suzie: "Demote that yob!
From now on, you'll have his fancy job!
"Likewise, McFlit, you noisy fool,
Take Suzie's place in the typing pool-
Fetch Suzie's coffee, and never again
Be trusted with a Parker pen."*
And so hurrah for Parker Quink
That problem-solving brand of ink:
It unclogged a pen and Suzie's career
As well as many an office ear.
(*He may run into trouble when his typewriter ribbon needs changing, though.)
[Life, September 10, 1945.]